Welcome to My World

Greetings and salutations.

At the time I begin this, my natal Sun is touching the Ascendant. By the time I post, the Moon will have moved into Aries, to meet with Mars and Venus… and also my Ascendant. I feel this is the perfect time to begin. To tell my story, my stories, of living a life by the light of my very own Indigo Moon.

I have been here for 37 years. For 37 years, I have struggled in this life. I have never met my father. I always felt more like a souvenir from my mom’s military days in Puerto Rico, than a person worthy of existence.

I struggled with school. I am naturally very smart, but I felt any effort was wasted without validation from my father. It carried into adulthood. I first had a toxic relationship which lasted six years, then almost rejected this man I married because I felt unworthy of someone so good.

Which brings me to now… We had to move five years ago for my husband’s job. At the time, I had a position I loved. I am a long-time server/bartender. Being sixth-house strong, I was good at my job. Having to leave there and face the unknown here, led me to drink. A lot. Once I moved here, as I feared, I was unable to find a similar supportive working environment. I felt compelled to have a job out in the world, but what kind? Without paternal support I was always hindered to even find what my dreams could be. Even though I was good at what I was doing, I still felt empty, and disconnected from purpose or direction. Even my husband said it was like I was lost. And I was, lost in the bottle.

Almost two years ago, right at my Jupiter Return, we bought our perfect house. Comfortable, serene sunroom, with a pool and woods beyond. Indeed I felt blessed, but it wasn’t enough. Even this amazing home could not fill the hole inside of me. I drank even more.

I have always been drawn to Astrology, and in recent years it has become an obsession. I truly believe the Divine Spirit has given us Astrology as a guide map to ourselves, and our lives. It has given me great self-awareness.

It is through this obsession that I started reading what it means to be an Empath. That resonated with me. Then around the Solstice New Moon (on my MC) and Christmastime, I felt compelled to subject my birth chart for analysis by people who know a whole lot more than me.

Two people changed my life. They helped me identify as Indigo, and to begin writing. To heal myself, and maybe help someone else, too. It was the catalyst for me to quit drinking. I am now six weeks without being drunk, and it will only get better from here.

This is my blog, and my voice. I will use this blog to tell my stories. Some could be inspiring, some entertaining. I will also use this blog as kind of an Astrological journal. It will help me create even stronger self-awareness, and maybe I can help with that for you, too.

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8 thoughts on “Welcome to My World

  1. Well done Carrie, that wasn’t so hard was it? Just know and remember that what you write is never about ‘you’, it’s about ‘it’.
    What is ‘it’ about? That’s what will interest me most. Best shining xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Great job Carrie. Congratulations! Looks like you will be on a great journey with a compassionate healing that will benefit many that can identify with your path. No Sabias que fueras Puertoriquena. Ha!
    We are all here to support each other. Not as gurus but as peers and compadres on separate journeys with intersecting bridges.
    In Lock’esh

    Like

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